Believe in Yourself

I never knew there is power deep within ourselves. I often saw people doing great things and I believed they were just great naturally.

I read many amazing stories of great people like Muhammad Ali, Tony Robbins, Nick Vujicic…. But it all ended up there. It somehow always felt so fictional albeit very motivating. I just couldn’t understand what is inside these great humans that I didn’t have.

What did they have that they shook the world with their unrivaled footsteps?

The turning point of my life

After I joined high school, I never had a clear vision to be successful. I was just another teenage girl who joined school and that’s it. I pretty much understood that I can just study a little and “pass”, which was quite enough. So in my first term I just played around with my friends, having lots of fun in boarding school and being a “mono” – a form one student.

At the closing ceremony of the end of the term, they called out the top 10 students awarding them with stationery and other good stuff. I was just seated somewhere in the crowd clapping not understanding how they were the best students “were they studying like seriously or just some naturally bright students?”. It somehow stuck in my heart but I kind of neglected it excited I am finally going home. 100+ students had A’s, I was nowhere there.

We always had exams on the first week of a new term, just to make as read during the holidays and report to school on time. On the opening I reported to school late because I waited for my friend, we just somehow didn’t care much about the repercussions of missing exams and we braved ourselves “they are just gonna make us re-sit for those exams”. Unfortunately, that never happened, so we had just sat for few papers. Results? With those 0 in some subjects, you don’t want to know!

To avoid being retained in school for bad grades during holidays, I resolved to study harder. I doubted that I could make it. But I had to do something, “I can’t stay for extra tuition when everyone else go home!”, I told myself. After lots of hard work and persistence, I passed just enough to not be retained for tuition. It was unbelievable for me, did I just do that? Does it mean I have the capability to do better? It then dawned on me, “we choose what we want to be in life”. That was the U-turn of my academic life and I can vow, that every other aspect of my life changed.

I now understood what the likes of Muhammad Ali had. Without a doubt, they had immense belief in themselves!

It wasn’t that I could not have better grades, it was that I never believed I could have them.

I chose to shut down all the voices within me that always said; “they are naturally brilliant, you ain’t that just chill”.

Vincent van Gogh said;

“If you hear a voice within you say ‘you cannot paint,’ then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.”

I silenced that voice. I nurtured my mind with thoughts of greatness. I started believing in myself and in the power within me.

I never listened to what other people said. It didn’t matter. I knew what I am and what I am capable of doing on my own.

It ain’t just about academics…

You might be thinking, is professional academics all that there is in life? No its not. We are all gifted in our own ways. For me, it was books that made me understand the power within myself. That I have the capability to be who I want. I can study hard and be that doctor, that architect, business-lady…it’s all up to me. The key to what I want to be is in my hands.

Whatever your line of profession is, the bottom line is, do you believe you are in control of who you become in the next 10 years?

The biggest difference I’ve noticed between successful people and unsuccessful people isn’t intelligence or opportunity or resources. It’s the belief that they can make their goals happen.

You get to choose which road you will take.

Choose the road that will unleash your potential.

Believe in You

Self-doubts won’t disappear into thin air just like that. You just have to get better at dealing with it. James wrote this beautiful article; What I do when I feel like my work isn’t good enough.

Every time you want to try new things, doubts will creep in. But do not follow your doubtful thoughts.

There is no one who can pump you better than yourself. You know you better.

When it gets tough, recall your successes. Find your way back to your inner you and know you have the power to achieve what you want in life.

Until next time, Chao!

Nurture Your Mind With Great Thoughts

I have not known anything powerful as a man’s thoughts.

They make or destroy you.

I think you’ll agree with me when I say: your mind defines you.

Isn’t it fascinating that you can change your worldview with your mind?

Negative Thinking

We all from time to time sulk into negative thoughts.

We fall into the circus of our own thoughts and see everything as a mess!

“I wanted to go swimming but it’s raining. Arrrgh! Nothing ever goes my way!”

“She didn’t pass by to say hello, she doesn’t like me!”

“I studied but I don’t think I will pass that exam.”

“I don’t think I will nail that interview, I really have no skills needed.”

Alas! You often are drowning in this ocean of your own negative thoughts.

“You will never be free until you free yourself from the prison of your own false thoughts.” ~Philip Arnold

How do I stop negative thoughts?

Getting negative thoughts off your brain is easier said than done.

It begins with you realizing that your thoughts are negative.

And that they are not helping you in anyway. They are rather a disease to your heart.

Separate your thoughts from facts. If it is raining, and you cannot go swimming, do not attach that to yourself. It totally has nothing to do with you.

Louise Hay says;

“I monitor my self-talk, making sure it is supportive and uplifting for myself and others.” ~ Louise Hay

Accept that life is challenging and that there is no smooth road. Face life head on and learn to accept how things turn out.  You always plan but God’s plan prevails.

If it didn’t work out this time, do not think “I am never lucky”. Instead think “I will do better next time”.

Healthy Thinking

We can’t think positively every time. Bad things happen to us.

We get fired.

We lose a loved one.

We fail terribly at things we thought we are good at.

And sometimes, sometimes, we just feel we suck at everything.

Really, we just can’t be purely positive people.

But we can switch our thoughts into a healthy one. Where when things happen to us, the good, the bad, the neutral – we look at the entire situation with clear glasses and not rose-colored glasses.

It means we approach life in a balanced way.

Developing healthy thinking will help you in many ways than you may realize. You will experience growth you have never imagined. You will also boost your confidence and feel your chest light-weight, ready to take on new challenges and improve yourself.

You’ll be happy. Because you have no thoughts to pull you down.

Benjamin Israeli said;

Nurture your mind with great thoughts, for you will never go any higher than you think.

Do NOT entertain negative thoughts or doubts in your head. You don’t have that space for negativity.

You can only go as far as your thoughts.

Think highly of yourself. Change your world by harnessing the power of healthy thinking.

Until next time, Chao!

 

Fan Your Sparks Into Flames

“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” – Arthur Ashe

We all have dreams, but not all of us dream enough to achieve them.

In fact, we have lost hope in them and we are just living for the sake of living. “Yeah whatever life brings.” So long as we eat and have a roof on our heads, that’s good enough.

Indeed, it is hard. 🙁

With all the challenges that we face in our day to day life, can we even speak about our dreams?

Let’s kindle anew in our mind and hearts the sparks of our dreams.

Dreams

Henry Ford didn’t wait for an opportunity to favor him, despite being poor and uneducated. To date there are more wheels under his name than any man who ever lived.

Thomas Edison lived his dream of a lamp after more than 10,000 failures.

Ray Kroc turned McDonald’s into the most successful food outlet in the world making him one of the richest men of his time. He was only a salesman of milkshakes.

The Wright brothers dreamed of a machine that would fly. Today, there exists a fleet of such.

Well, these people were great and brought great inventions. But, we really don’t like being compared to “great people”. It intimidates us. But it’s okay. They had bigger dreams….

What do you dream of?

Is there someone you know who lived their dreams?

Don’t you wish to live the life of your dreams everyday? Even if it is only your family or friends who will know about it?

Dreams Don’t Matter…

It isn’t about the idea…big or small. You don’t have to be Thomas Edison. You don’t need to revolutionize the world with a “wow” dream.

Brilliant dreams are good but it isn’t what matters. It is good if you have it, at least it shows you are still alive inside of you. But what is the importance of a dream that just remains to be a dream?

How to live your dreams is what matters.

If your dreams just sit back in your mind, that is where they will forever live.

Execution matters…

We all have dreams. But in order to make dreams come into reality, it takes an awful lot of determination, dedication, self-discipline, and effort. – Jesse Owens

You’ve got to live your dreams. No matter how small they are. It maybe small to the world but they maybe everything to you.

To live your dreams, you’ve got to consider many things because it ain’t a smooth road to go after your dreams. But remember, you need not figure everything out.

It is overwhelming to think of all things at once. To look around us and see people going for their dreams effortlessly, while here we are stuck not knowing what direction to take; and what was my dream again?

We mostly are at crossroads.

So, let’s take some baby steps.

Find Your Calling. Search within you and find your sparks. Along the way your dreams may change. You will want different things at different times because you keep evolving. Understand that that is okay. All you need to focus on, is how to achieve those dreams, of course, with calculated risks.

Get rid of anything that is a barrier to you achieving your goals. Give up your bad habits.

Commit to working on yourself. Someone somewhere alongside their day to day work, takes time to read more, to have a healthy lifestyle, to sharpen their skills. Someone has committed to having healthy and meaningful relationships. Someone is set to go back to school and advance their knowledge. Let that someone be you.

You’ve found your dream. You’ve given up your bad habits and are now committed to improving yourself. Now build a plan to achieve them. How are your daily activities helping you achieve that dream? We all ignore this part, thinking that it is a waste of time. Successful people ask, “What’s the one thing I can do today that will get me closer to my goal?”

Highly successful people don’t wait and hope for desired results. Success is never accidental for them. It’s the direct result of preparing, planning, and aligning their time with their most important goals.

Dream achievers have a clear vision of what they want and a strategic plan to carry out their mission.

Now,

It’s on you to flame yours sparks into flames, to flame your dreams into reality.

Light your little world.

Until next time, Chao!

You Need Not Figure Everything Out

Photo by MI PHAM on Unsplash

I miss being that kid who cared less about what is happening in the world. Being that super energetic human being who only cared about being happy. Where we all had big dreams and ambitions just by seeing what others have become.

I wanted to badly be a neurosurgeon after reading “Think Big” and all the series of Ben Carson. So, I kept telling my mum how I am going to operate people’s brains and help them with their illnesses. I didn’t even know what it takes to be one, but it didn’t really matter at that point in time. All I knew was, I am going to be a neurosurgeon. Period!

My friends had big dreams too. I am 99.99% sure, you had them too.

And here we are today, wishing it was as easy today as it was before. We’ve all grown up in different worlds under different circumstances and now with responsibilities on our shoulders. We’ve all forgotten how to just sit and be happy and with life moving at ninety miles per hour, we are forced to move with twice that speed for us to survive.

It is no longer a matter of pen and paper, it is as real as it gets. A point in time where you feel you are walking on a rope, one mistake and you are done for.

Living with the unknown…

For many of us, living without knowing what is in for us for the future, is dreadful. You are anxious, imbalanced and on your feet all the time.

You are afraid you will miss out on what you are meant to do. Deep down you know you want to do great things, but what exactly? You keep searching for your path, which at present seems very vague and blurry.

You don’t know what to do. Perhaps, you know a little of everything good you want. A well paying job. Great physique, healthy life, great social life (you’ve imagined going for that awesome holiday with friends because you are financially free), loving family, spiritually stable…

But, you don’t know where to start from. Everything is everywhere.

On top of it all, you just want answers. And you want them right now!

Hold on my friend!

Why are you trying to figure everything out?

You want to know what steps will lead to your success, happiness and whatever else you desire? You want guarantee that whatever tree you plant today will bear sweet fruits tomorrow?

Sorry friend, there is no guarantee in this life.

Your constant need to “figure out everything” only gives you more pain and suffering. Your mind and heart is not capable of understanding everything and having all the answers.  You will end up frustrated and exhausted.

So What Now?

Dance in the fog my friend! There is a circle of clarity within the fog, dance where you can see. As you keep moving forward, your circle of clarity goes with you. You will see more, when you get there.

They say “trust the process”. You need to take that to heart, deeply.

You can’t plan out your whole life.

It’s not to say we stop to think about our life. It is important to have direction, to have dreams and ambitions. It is important to have that drive, that grit and passion that keeps your fire burning. But it is not important to have all the answers in our palms. True well being does not depend on know-it-all.

Your “figured out” world could fall apart and your dreams could crash. You can fail at your well-laid out plan you thought would be your road to success or happiness. You could be completely wrong about everything you have “figured out”.

So stop trying to fit the puzzle. Just live your life. Letting go, as uncomfortable as it is, inevitably allows you to experience life without guilt, stress or pain.

“Cease trying to work everything out with your minds. It will get you nowhere. Live by intuition and inspiration and let your whole life be Revelation.” – Eileen Caddy

Keep in mind, you can’t figure it all out, because such is life, a puzzle. So, learn to let go and swim with the currents.

Self-reflection: Can you trust that your life circumstances, even though you can’t always explain them, are here for your awakening?

Until next time, Chao!

 

If You Understand This, You Are Set for Life of Your Dreams

There is no an iota of doubt that knowledge is power.

Since I embarked on the journey to read as often as I can, I have had a lot of “ah-ha” moments that have turned my world-of-thoughts around. For couple of years, my thoughts were aligned in one direction and I believed I was right and no one should change my thinking. Until I flipped pages of uncomfortable truths, deep insights and emotions, then I awoke from my slumber.

Here are some realizations I woke up to. I haven’t experienced all of them deeply but to some extent. Some are still hard to absorb in me like #5, while some like #3 have empowered me to stand when the grounds are shaking.

1. You and you alone are responsible for your life.

Really? Yes!

Everything about your life is a result of you doing or not doing…your health, physical fitness, feelings, achievements, quality of your relationships…everything!

Excuses and blames will comfort you temporarily, but you will never be fully contented because deep down you know your life is in your hands.

Cease attributing your problems to people, environment or circumstances and silence your unhelpful inner voice from rehearsing the excuse-filled conversation.

You are in charge of how you feel, choose to feel great even when people have crossed your path.

Your Life, Your Rules. It is your decision to make. Bob Moawad says; “The best day of your life is the one on which you decide your life is your own. No apologies or excuses. No one to lean on, rely on, or blame. The gift is yours — it is an amazing journey — and you alone are responsible for the quality of it. This is the day your life really begins.”

2. Take chances, make mistakes.

You are afraid you are not prepared. You are afraid you will fail or give up on the way.

I took the chance to start writing after years of thinking I someday will. I suck at it. But guess what? In the mean time, I will keep sharing my imperfection with you and find a way to perfect my imperfection while I keep soaring. How’s that?

“’It’s impossible,’ said pride. ‘It’s risky,’ said experience. ‘It’s pointless,’ said reason. ‘Give it a try,’ whispered the heart.” ~Unknown

Of course no one likes to jump into a dark hole. But, how I wish life was full of colorful light bulbs so we could see the end.

Unless you are satisfied with your life, you have to take that leap of faith.

You don’t have to be Muhammad Ali to start boxing. But you have to start now if you want to be like Muhammad Ali at some point in your life. That decision to start is what matters the most. Take small steps towards achieving what you want in life.

Stop waiting for all your ducks to be in a row to start something new.

And you can’t just quit after your first disappointment. It is rare to get it right at the beginning. You have to go all the way to the end. You must be gritty to achieve the best in life.

3. Life is a roller coaster

A perfect life? Even Cinderella worked like a house-help before becoming a princess.

Just like in a roller coaster, you will be screaming when you start to fall.

There is no such thing as a perfect life. Today you are up, happy and things are working well for you. Tomorrow you are down overwhelmed with sadness, anxiety and challenges. Some of the things you have really worked hard for, may not work out as you planned.

None of us are safe from the disappointments of life. Life is unpredictable.

Do not be crippled by your down moments in life. They are there to make you stronger. Embrace them and never give up.

Just like a muscle needs to tear to grow stronger, sometimes we need to wade into our own darkness to find a brighter light.” ~Lori Deschene

4. Your obstacles are your stepping stones

It is a sure deal, you will face obstacles in life.

You probably see obstacles as barriers to your success. When you run into difficulties, you straight away want to run away from it.

To achieve your goals, you have to change how you perceive obstacles. You have to start seeing them as an opportunity for growth.

Ryan Holiday says;

“We forget: In life, it doesn’t matter what happens to you or where you came from. It matters what you do with what happens and what you’ve been given.”

You just need a little more persistence and a little more effort to overcome all your obstacles.

5. Perfectionism is your Barricade

We plan, plan and plan to avoid mistakes and blame.

Undoubtedly, It is good to plan your life but do not live your life on the drawing board. Make sketches, get up and go live your life.

Perfectionism will cripple your journey to living your life fully. It is a barrier to your happiness and fulfillment because you are too focused on the result and not the process. You tell yourself you are not good enough so you keep trying harder. You don’t stop for a moment to tap your own back.

Cut yourself some slack! Quit trying to be perfect.

“Do your best and let the rest go. You can’t be perfect, no matter how hard you try, so give yourself credit for making an effort and try to stop stressing about the outcome.” – Lori Deschene

Be a perfectly imperfect being!

Until next time, Chao!

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All You Need Is 1 Yes!

“If you can not get used to failure — just like a boxer — if you can’t get used to being hit, how can you win?” Jack Ma.

All you need is 1 Yes. That university, that job, that internship or that new opportunity you are looking for, all you need is 1 Yes to get your foot in the door.

You have sent those applications. They said they will get back in two weeks. Two weeks have passed but nobody has said anything. “But I met all the requirements!”. Yes you did honey. But you know what, Jack Ma, the Founder and CEO of Alibaba with a net worth of over $39 billion according to Forbes, was rejected by Harvard University 10 times.

You might think, “yeah those are the unique ones”. True, I agree with you. But, Jack Ma never thought he would be this rich when he applied for a job at KFC but got rejected. He didn’t know he would be this rich when he applied to be a waiter at a four star hotel in China, no he didn’t! Just like you don’t know whats coming after those rejections.

“You have to get used to failure. If you can’t get used to being hit, how can you win?” Jack Ma says speaking at the University of Nairobi.

Picking yourself up after all those rejections is tough, even for tough people. Hearing “No” has not and will never be pleasant. Do not ask “Why is this happening to me?” because negative questions only leads to negative answers. First of all, take rejections positively. No does not always mean you are not the perfect fit. Channel that disappointment into “How can I bounce back?”. Secondly, get used to them. You want to be successful? A ton of No’s are coming your way. Finally, reflect on your applications and ask for feedback.

You. You can’t give up. You have something to offer the world right? You have to be resilient and persistent in whatever you are searching for. Resilient people have the ability to bounce back and forge ahead. Be your own cheerleader and champion and keep looking for that 1 yes. Yes, just 1 yes.

Don’t allow No to paralyze you. All you need is 1 Yes.

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My Little Voice – Migra

Photo Courtesy of Eric

“You can do anything! You will go far!” Human beings have told you that… two times? Ten? or you’ve heard until you’ve lost count? Maybe. Maybe not. So where on earth is this thought of “I am not sure…I can’t do it…I don’t think I can…bla! bla! bla!” coming from? That little voice inside of you, that has control over you than anyone else! I call that little voice “Migra”, because all it does, is cause migraines!

As I write this my Migra says;

“Are you sure about this? No one will read this…no one! How will you start publishing what you are not competent in? Let’s start tomorrow, or next month, perhaps you will have more readers by then”.

It keeps talking, talking, talking…it is like a war, Migra with all the weapons and you as the enemy without soldiers to defend you. The battlefield in your mind and casualties buried in your chest. This is unfair! Why is my own self fighting with me? Shouldn’t we be partners in crime?

That voice can cripple your dreams…no not can, it will! It will shut the doors of your growth. It will dim the light at the end of the tunnel. It will paralyze your entire being and put off the flames of passion within you. Because that voice is the fear within you talking. It is that upcoming exam. It is that job interview you have scheduled. It is that start-up you have been thinking of. It is that voice of your family and friends saying “you screwed”. All Migra does is make noise, occupying your head with aimless thoughts. Just breathe…

So, it is time to fight back. We can’t give up. We can’t lose to Migra. NO! So taking a step back and replying to Migra;

“I am sure about this. I have been wanting to do this for the last 3 years, but you have been holding me up. I won’t let you win this time. I am going to publish this, people will read, and even if they don’t, I will keep sharing my thoughts with the world, someone somewhere with a little voice taking over them will read and get enlightened”

You can do anything. You will go far. If you have never heard it from anyone, or perhaps you have from everyone, today take it from me, a Migra fighter. Do not pay attention to your Migra, you are not what it says, take a grip and define yourself!